Tim Vine is a British comedian famous for his puns and witty quips. A long long time ago, Okto (then known as Arts Central) used to broadcast The Sketch Show of which Tim Vine was part of the performing troupe. It’s addictive and absolutely hilarious.
This year, he won Lafta’s best joke with the line: “Conjunctivitis.com – that’s a site for sore eyes”.
Some time back, he swept the top prize at the 2010 Edinburgh Fringe Festival with “I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again.”
Here’s another one for which he was named runner-up at the 2004 Edinburgh Festival: “Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.”
If all of the above still doesn’t move you (really?), here are some others:
“Velcro. what a rip-off.”
“So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said ‘Who’s speaking please?’ And a voice said ‘You are.'”
What did I tell you? I just cannot resist puns.